Perfect, except that maybe we need to get them to read this too, with things said for their point of view!
I make all the effort and they still shrug it off as ‘all this new generation things wont last the test of time’ attitude will kill my confiding spirit too… and i will be back to doing things behind their backs…
Err, i didn’t really do that but am just thinking that they shud read this kinda piece too!

Oh yes… we all feel that parents don’t understand us. I think we should try to get ourselves in their shoes once in a while to understand what they want from us and why?
When you are open with them I believe parents also trust you more

This is a perfect list to improve relations with parents!

Nice post, Meenakshi! During my adolescent years I perpetually thought my parents never cut any slack for me and I was on a constant warpath and rebellion. Now having recently crossed over onto the other side after marriage and almost on the brink of parenthood, I realise all the things they said and did was indeed for the best. Maybe it wasn’t conveyed in the right way. But I guess I have learnt from their mistakes and would use another approach with the same values while raising my kids. Yet whatever limited knowledge tools they had in their time, I don’t think they did too bad a job in raising me

Shirsha, I first started writing the post as a wish list of what children would like their parents to know and acknowledge but halfway through writing it, I felt that most people reading this are probably younger. So it became a what we can do better to improve relations with our parents. But point taken, and you can soon expect a post for the parents too!

Ashley, I think most of us, in our relationship with our parents, forget that it is a two-way street like all other relationships. And I agree with you, the trust factor is really important. If parents feel that they can trust you to be responsible, they are more likely to be receptive to your opinions. On the other hand, if you are constantly doing things behind their back and they find out (they usually do), besides feeling let down and hurt, they also start to question your decision making abilities and hence have a problem with everything.

Candy, you said it! Being on the other side changes the way you view your parents. Of course, I do a lot of things differently with my daughter, but on the whole, I can now understand that my parents had a tough job and did their best.

Thanks meenakshi , your article helps me to rethink my attitude with my parents . I am having tough time with them since I started understanding what life meant for me . :))
I always argue them and blame it to generation gap but never try to bridge that gap . :)) well will try more hard make our relation more beautiful .

Excellent post ! ! !
Inspite of the fact dat i hv realised all dat u hv mentioned in ur post,over a period of time, i hv always and am still finding it difficult to reach out to my dad. If however i were to meet sm1 exhibiting the same personality traits as my father, i wud hv been able to communicate with dat person. I guess the bootomline is dat i do not wish to bridge the gap between the two of us, dont know y…..

Thank you Sunanda and Pritesh.
Pritesh, speaking as a parent, I can say that most of us do try to be good moms and dads. We may not be very good at it, but our heart is in the right place. I think you know that about your dad already. Every relationship needs work and you will realize that all the more as you grow older. Try to make an effort with your dad, and I am sure you will start seeing some difference. Good luck!

Sunanda, thats the spirit girl

Good one Meenakshi. Its only over the past couple of years that Ive stopped fighting tooth and nail over everything with my parents and tried to work with rather than against them over issues. It still not tickety boo all the time, but I’m still amazed at how much we have all changed (mostly for the better) with regard to how we treat each other.

Bikerdude, you are right. Once the perception on both sides is that the other person is making an effort and respects your opinion, negotiation automatically becomes an easier task.